By Cynthia Martin

For the Sequim Gazette

This article is to be read by fathers only. In it are some of the ways to become a hero to your wife and children. At the same time, you can learn to enjoy life and participate more fully in being a member of the family.

Fathers are frequently considered second parents to their children. As a result, moms become the heroes. Moms are the ones who buy things for the kids and who generally take them places. Moms are the ones who suggest where the family should go and dads just come along. Moms are even the ones who most of the time do the discipline. Fathers may help with older children but sometimes the role has totally shifted to the mom by this time.

But you can be a take charge father and do things with your family. Be the one who plans the outing in the park or who takes them to the zoo. Be the one who at dinner prompts your little one to tell about the wonderful sites he saw at the park. Be the one who takes them to the store and lets them pick out their favorite foods. A trip to Dairy Queen or the ice cream snack shop is a great time for just you and your little girl to talk about what she has been doing and what she would like to be doing.

Be the one to plan with your little boy which movie he would like to see this weekend. Be the one to put your daughter to bed tonight and read to her one or two stories before she goes to sleep. Tell your wife you are taking her out to dinner tonight, and be the one who arranges for the babysitter and picks out the special place to go.

Don’t forget to regularly talk to each of the members of your family. This includes your babies, your wife, and other relatives and friends. Add hugs for your children because hugs are incredibly important and lasting in their effect.

When you talk regularly with your children, they will give you clues about what you need to do to be a hero to them. They are a great source of information that is frequently forgotten or ignored.

When you have had a successful day of being really involved in many ways with your family it will feel good. That good feeling will not only be felt by you but also by other members in your family as well.

There are so many ways for you to be a hero to your family but all of them take a bit of time to plan. Plans don’t have to be elaborate or expensive. But, most importantly, it is great to have your family think you are really a knight in shining armor … a genuine hero for all you do.

Cynthia Martin is the founder of the First Teacher program and former executive director of Parenting Matters Foundation, which published newsletters for parents, caregivers and grandparents.