A great way to relax

The holiday season can be a happy but hectic time. One thing you should set aside time for is the Breakfast with Santa. This event, which is put on by the Parenting Matters Foundation and the First Teacher program, will be from 8 a.m.-noon Saturday, Dec. 5. If you want to have breakfast, it is $10 for anyone over 11 and $5 for younger.

But you don’t have to buy breakfast even though it is a very special treat from Sodexo. You can just enjoy a fun morning watching the children talk with Santa. You can bring a child or just yourself and watch this delightful scene as Santa gives each child a chance to talk, to have a new book and to have a picture taken.

Everyone gets very busy at Christmas. This is a great time to sit, relax and watch. You can be a friend, neighbor, aunt or grandpa and just enjoy the activity. Parent always enjoy the time but hopefully you will encourage some others to join you.

Parenting Matters: Teaching children about giving

Children love opening presents during the holidays. It is fun to watch but sometimes it can upset you because your child gets so much and it doesn’t seem to really matter. She opens one and then sets it aside and wants the next one. Many times children don’t even say thank you; they just want more.

So what can a parent do to help a child learn about giving as well as getting? Actually, teaching your child about giving can be the best present you give your child this holiday season.

Learning about giving begins when your child is little and begins in small ways. Think about the widow down the street who doesn’t have any family around. Talk with your child about baking cookies and taking her some. This is likely to sound good to your young child except for one problem. She will want to eat the cookies. So make plenty for the neighbor and plenty for home. Help her fix them up special and let her give them to the neighbor down the street.

Help your child understand that he doesn’t have to have money to give something. Teach him about gift certificates for work or breakfast in bed. Help him make the certificate and then the young child can decorate it or the older child can learn something on the computer to make it special. Certificates for doing the laundry, raking the lawn, shoveling snow, giving the dog a bath or cleaning the laundry room are all appropriate.

Involve your child when selecting a gift for someone special. You may think one gift is better and she may think another is better. Let it be her choice. Even if you are talking about making a donation to a nonprofit, see where she is. You may be into cancer research but she may value the Humane Society. You want her to feel that the gift she gives is important.

Be a role model for giving. Giving can be something you do together. Maybe you volunteer to do some baby-sitting for a neighbor so she can do shopping. Maybe you donate household items and small-size toiletries like shampoo and toothpaste to a homeless shelter. He could help you decorate nice bags to send them in.

Make giving visible for your child. When you send a check for charity, it has little impact on the child who can’t see where it is going. But delivering canned foods is more tangible for children to see. You also can “adopt” a needy family and choose gifts that your child can wrap for them.

Along with giving there needs to be talking. Have family conversations about what each of you are thankful for. This helps your child understand that other families may not have many of those things. Giving and talking about giving helps your child understand its importance.

We all need to be into giving. It teaches us that we matter. It gives you a sense of pride, responsibility and thoughtfulness. It makes you realize that you and your actions matter.

Once again, as in many areas of life, there are important lessons that parents or someone in the child’s life need to teach something to the child. Life’s lessons are everywhere and parents have a huge responsibility to make sure they are taught to the children they love.

Cynthia Martin is the founder of the First Teacher program and director of Parenting Matters Foundation, which publishes newsletters for parents, caregivers and grandparents. Reach Martin at pmf@olypen.com or at 681-2250.