From the Back Nine: Chip shots

I have a new chair. I can see why you may think this is not exactly newsworthy, but it is to me. The owner was a tiny little lady not up to a Battle with the Beast. This is how I was gifted this nearly new $1,500 chair, something I had never aspired to.

Do you have any idea the technology that has gone into recliners? The last one I purchased was about the same time the Bears were doing the Super Bowl Shuffle, so I had no idea what has gone on since.

This thing is as complex as a mechanical bull. It is the only chair I have ever owned that came with detailed instructions for usage (usually the instructions are back yourself up and sit). Maybe it’s so complex because it doubles as a full-length bed and an elevator. Nothing else in the house is so loaded with emergency preparedness. It has back up batteries for when the power goes out so that you can get out of it since there is no manual overdrive.

The day will come that I will need the ‘ejection assist’ it is armed with. For now, I can’t get out of it until it is good and ready. Which is quite a learning experience when you are used to getting to the phone before it stops ringing.

It is nearly time for the Sequim Farmers and Artisans Market. My friend Heidi and I run a booth selling books by local authors. Since it is a not-for-profit, we do everything on a shoestring. But this year we bought a new booth. Not white, like all the others — ours is purple-striped. Garish might be an accurate descriptive of the decor.

We’ll see how many infractions of the rules we are committing. If you see two elderly women sitting out there with no booth whatsoever, you’ll know we’re in the penalty box.

Sis and I have a hot tub that hasn’t been used in forever. We’re getting it up and running again since it will be our stay-cation. Part of the revitalizing process is to shock your hot tub.

Turns out this doesn’t mean to let it see you in your bathing suit. It involves the addition of 40 chemicals, an incantation by a deranged priest, and planting a potato in the back yard. We’ll see how it goes.

Linda B. Myers is a founding member of Olympic Peninsula Authors. Her novels are available at Pacific Mist in Sequim, Port Book and News in Port Angeles, and on Amazon.com. Contact her at myerslindab@gmail.com.